Post by EWA.com on Jan 23, 2022 20:12:43 GMT
After the video finishes buffering and the ad warning the viewer that vaping puts “toxic metals” into your lungs allows you to hit the “skip ad” button, the cameras open up on a studio set reminiscent of ESPN’s PTI or First Take somewhere in the E-Arena. The camera pans across the desk in the studio to see the friendly (in Bischoff’s case not-so-friendly) faces of the EWA Recap Panel. As the trio sort out their notes, the camera zooms in on the smiling face of hostess/moderator Renee Young.
RENEE YOUNG: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Sunday Night SLAM! Post Show Panel! I’m your host Renee Young and joining me, as always, are the legendary icons of professional wrestling Eric Bischoff and Jim Ross. Guys… what a way to kick off 2022! This edition of Sunday Night SLAM! saw new faces, returns, attacks, new rivalries, and a pair of newly crowned champions falling apart in front of eyes!
A wry smile peeks out of the corner of Bischoff’s mouth as he nods along with Renee.
ERIC BISCHOFF: Sounds like the EWA to me. As the former EWA General Manager, I think I can speak to that better than anyone.
JIM ROSS: Well, yes and no. It isn’t unusual for the EWA to get off to a bit of a sleepy start as the roster recovers from SuperBrawl, but a heck ton of new blood has definitely kicked our new year into gear! Also, Eric, you don't need to keep reminding us that you used to run the show here.
RENEE YOUNG: That’s an excellent point, JR, and I think that’s a great starting point for tonight’s show. We saw quite a few new and returning faces tonight who all made big first impressions. In no particular order: Giant Silva, the Undertaker, Rob Van Dam, Jeff Hardy, the Mean Street Posse, and the tandem of Rhea Ripley and Hook who make up Team Taz. Eric, was there anyone in particular that caught your eye?
ERIC BISCHOFF: I think that Team Taz unit is going to be tough to ignore. Hook is every bit as vicious in the ring as his father was even if he’s not as verbally boisterous as Taz. Then you have Rhea Ripley who is maybe one of the few women in the EWA that could match-up comparatively to Jade Cargill in terms of size and strength. Taz put together a tough little fight team that I think will be making a big splash sooner rather than later.
JIM ROSS: Eric is leaning towards all the young blood but this old dog loves a veteran presence. For years people have stated that the one thing RVD is missing is experience and now, as a vet, he’s the right combination of skill, flash, and knowledge. Giant Silva is another beast of a man who has been adding more to his repertoire and, frankly, I don’t know how you’re going to plan around someone at that size with that much power. Then, of course, you have the Undertaker who has returned to the EWA like an old gunslinger. I can’t wait to see what the American Badass has in store for the EWA!
RENEE YOUNG: I think it’s safe to say that we’re all looking forward to seeing where these competitors go in 2022 as they further acclimate themselves to the EWA Universe. There was another new competitor who debuted this week by taking on one of the mainstays in the EWA Women’s division when Thunder Rosa faced the seemingly unhinged Liv Morgan!
RENEE YOUNG: Now Thunder Rosa fell short to Liv Morgan in this contest but there were large stretches of this match where “La Mera Mera” looked like she was in control. Even though Liv has been a little more distressed lately, she still showed that same elite level of speed and quick thinking to take the victory here. How do you think Thunder Rosa bounces back after this loss, JR?
JIM ROSS: I don’t think we need to worry too much about that, Renee. Thunder Rosa spoke about having a “fire” inside of her and we could see a lot of that in the match itself. This is a very driven woman who is determined to represent the women of lucha libre in the ring and cement her own legacy in the EWA. Liv Morgan was the better woman last night but I’d bet my bottom dollar that Thunder Rosa isn’t going to let this slow her down.
ERIC BISCHOFF: You’re asking the wrong question, Renee. This match said more about Liv Morgan than it did about Thunder Rosa’s “fire”. For the last few weeks Liv Morgan has been on the verge of tears and ranting almost exclusively about love and whatever. What I’m getting at is she looked like even more of a pushover than she was last year when she was all “bubbly” and “cute.” That display of viciousness and clever thinking in the ring showed me that she is not only tougher than she’s letting on but is more of a contender for the women’s championship than she was back in November when she had a shot at the title. Jade Cargill should be looking over her shoulder because getting her heart broken was the best thing that ever happened to Liv Morgan in my opinion. Well… that is if Jade can get past the 2021 Queen of the Ring Taya Valkyrie next week.
RENEE YOUNG: Well I’m sure we’ll hear more from both of these women soon. The EWA Women’s Champion Aliyah may have been absent this past show after winning the title for a third time but there is no shortage of women who are angling to be next in line for a title shot. Moving on we had some more singles action this week as Glenn Gilbertti of Swinger’s Palace was looking to bounce back from losing the EWA Tag Team Championship at SuperBrawl as he faced The Brian Kendrick.
ERIC BISCHOFF: Renee, I’ve known Glenn Gilbertti for a very long time and I can tell you with the utmost confidence that if it weren’t the fact that Gilbertti is technically a former champion - Kendrick would have nothing to be proud of. Johnny Swinger and Glenn Gilbertti were two goofs who snuck into WCW right before the company was merged with the WWF by Shane McMahon - they’ve been leaches their entire careers. Regardless of how I may feel about those two morons, a victory over a former champion - especially a recent former champion - never hurts. There are several new champions in the EWA now and Kendrick could very easily swing this victory into a TV title shot or even a tag title shot if he finds the right partner. That is if he can get his eyes off the Hollywood sign for five minutes.
RENEE YOUNG: I’d like to get you back in here, JR. What are your thoughts on that “entertaining” affair between Glenn Gilbertti and The Brian Kendrick?
JIM ROSS: Well I think Eric may be a bit too harsh on both guys but it is true they both enjoy taking shortcuts. In these types of encounters it comes down to luck and who can screw over who quicker. It’s important to note that Gilbertti didn’t seem to want this match. My sources tell me that Johnny Swinger booked him in this match to “cheer” his partner up so Kendrick may have had the advantage there. What I will say about The Brian Kendrick is that a good victory like this does put him in the conversation for title contention.
RENEE YOUNG: Well I’m surprised and happy to see you both agree about something.
ERIC BISCHOFF: That’s not a hard task when the Disco Inferno is involved, Renee - no one likes Glenn Gilbertti. Gilbertti’s mother probably hates him just as much as we do.
RENEE YOUNG: We just spoke about the former tag team champion attempting to bounce back, but they weren’t the only ones looking to get back to the top of their respective divisions. We heard from both Pete Dunne and Santino Marella who have both, in their roundabout ways, announced that they were going to pick up where they left off.
JIM ROSS: I wouldn’t say that Santino Marella has that far to work his way back. He was in the final two of SuperBrawl, he’s the 2021 King of the Ring, and he’s owed a title shot against Chris Jericho. “Le Champion” may not want to be too focused on his “SuperBrawl” celebration considering the Italian Stallion is hot on his tail!
ERIC BISCHOFF: Chris Jericho will be fine, JR. He’s in the best shape he’s ever been in and, frankly, I don’t think there is anyone in the EWA that can stop him… but… Pete Dunne could be a problem. The laundry list of the careers the Bruiserweight has killed in the EWA is growing longer by the minute now that he smashed the remnants of Black Thought LLC and Kazuchika Okada’s arm at the same time. Dunne wants gold again. It could be Jericho for the World title, Shannon Moore for the National title, or Jimmy Havoc for the TV title - but I can tell you that it won’t be the tag team titles.
RENEE YOUNG: I think what’s interesting in that regard, Eric, is the state that each of our champions are in. Jimmy Havoc and Aliyah both were not able to attend SLAM! for various reasons. Shannon Moore was found bloody backstage without an attacker in sight. Chris Jericho is obviously loving life to the degree that he paid some man to dress up like an old fashioned town crier to announce his latest celebratory display of narcissism. The tag team champions? Well, that’s another story. Before we dive into that, let’s talk about this week’s main event as the Dungeon Dynasty tandem of Ben Carter and Matt Hart faced off with the Worldwide Underground’s Ace Austin and Jack Evans! I know both of these teams felt like they were needing to bounce back from setbacks, JR. How do you think they fared?
JIM ROSS: It was high-flying action as one would expect, Renee, and well worthy of being a main event despite the young ages of most of the competitors in the ring. I know that the Dungeon Dynasty fell short in their triple dog collar match against Team Bliss at SuperBrawl but they showed a lot of heart out there again. These young men just don't know when to say quit and they have the raw talent to see them through when the fight is at its toughest! In fact they had that match all but won until that jezebel Lindsay Snow showed up out of nowhere to attack Julia Hart! That was the opening the Worldwide Underground needed to take advantage of the Dungeon Dynasty and steal that win!
ERIC BISCHOFF: That’s just another important life lesson for the Dungeon Dynasty to learn. Ace Austin may still be wet behind the ears but Jack Evans is a veteran in every sense of the word. He saw an opening and the Worldwide Underground moved up the ranks a little further. All of their hard work against Swinger and Gilbertti officially amounted to nothing and it's going to take quick thinking from Evans and the talent of Ace to get them back in the race. What this match showed me, personally, is that the absence of Nattie Neidhart is hurting those kids, JR. If they had a veteran out there they wouldn’t have allowed Snow and Hart’s little catfight to take their eye off the ball.
JIM ROSS: Catfight?! Eric, Lindsay Snow came out unprovoked to attack Julia Hart while she was out supporting her teammates!
ERIC BISCHOFF: How do you know it was unprovoked, Jim? Maybe Julia Hart made some sort of a snarky comment backstage? Maybe she posted something catty on Twitter? You have no idea if it was unprovoked or not!
RENEE YOUNG: Well speaking of unprovoked attacks… gentlemen, what in the world has gotten into Drew McIntyre? SuperBrawl has a long history of making strange bedfellows for the tag team titles, but Dak Draper and Drew McIntyre should have worked on paper! Both upstanding, exciting young, powerful competitors, both with something to prove… and for McIntyre to cheapshot Dak Draper… I’m just stunned. Drew McIntyre has always been a beacon for good sportsmanship and doing the right thing.
ERIC BISCHOFF: Simply put the man got tired of being in second place, Renee. His team placed third in SuperBrawl, he was the runner-up to Adam Page in the Civil War match, he lost the TV title to Pete Dunne and spent months locked in a war with him that put him on the injured list for a time, and he fell short at King of the Ring. SuperBrawl was the straw that broke the camel’s back and I couldn’t be more proud of him.
RENEE YOUNG: Wait, proud?!
ERIC BISCHOFF: Absolutely, Renee. Drew McIntyre has been missing that killer instinct… that ruthless aggression if you will. We’ve seen flashes of it against Dunne and in the Chamber of Horrors and, wouldn’t you know, that’s when we’ve seen McIntyre thrive. He’s needed this and, unfortunately for Dak Draper, he’s about to be made an example of.
JIM ROSS: I wouldn’t write the “Mile High Magnum” off so quickly, Eric. Dak Draper has shown to be just as tough and just as capable. Draper is a three time tag team champion now, made it to the finals of the King of the Ring, and made the first three eliminations of the SuperBrawl match. Draper is someone that people have been itching to see make a singles run, no disrespect meant to J. Fowler, and Drew McIntyre may have just woken a sleeping giant.
RENEE YOUNG: Well we won’t have to wait long to see our tag team champions explode as McIntyre and Draper face off in a winner take all match. Before we run through the card on next week’s Sunday Night SLAM!, we figured it might be fun to introduce a new segment on the panel where we look back on a classic EWA match from the EWA Network. So in honor of the EWA Annual Awards, we are proud to present the match that won the 2018 Stipulation of the Year. From 2018’s Red White & Bruised, The Miz versus the Big Show in the first ever Autograph Match! Enjoy!
AUTOGRAPH MATCH
BIG SHOW vs. THE MIZ
30 MIN. TIME LIMIT
As the bell sounds, Miz mocks the Big Show by making faces at him and acting like the Big Show is some giant goof. Show doesn't seem impressed and points to the palm of his hand, the very palm that he had read earlier this week to predict the winner of this match. The Referee calls for the bell and Miz reaches out and extends a hand to the Big Show! He wants a handshake! Big Show isn't so sure about that and swats it away. Miz backs away and nods as if to say, "alright, I get that" and then walks to the far corner, where his beautiful wife Maryse jumps up onto the apron to give him a good luck kiss. Show is starting to get annoyed and comes over towards the Miz, but then Miz runs right at Show and goes for a huge kick in the nuts only for Show to catch his foot! Big Show wags his finger back-and-forth to say no, no, no and then unleashes a HUGE open hand palm smack to the chest that sends an echoing sound throughout the arena and immediately leaves a huge hand print on Miz's chest!
SCOTT STANFORD: Miz looked to end this one the way he did their previous encounter but Big Show had it scouted!
DON WEST: Forget an autograph, I think you could get an accurate read of Big Show's fingerprints on The Miz's chest! Look at that red spot!
Miz is holding his chest as Big Show's handprint takes up most of his pectoral region. Big Show now lifts him up and grabs him into a surprising overhead suplex. This is a David versus Goliath situation, not unlike our opening match...but unlike that one, the crowd is not behind the smaller man as they don't seem to care for The Miz at all. Big Show grabs Miz up and gives him a hellacious hip toss sending him clear across the ring. He then charges into the corner, driving all his weight in the form of an elbow right into the A-Lister, smashing him against the turnbuckles! Miz looks hurt, as Big Show now grabs him around the throat.
DON WEST: He's got him goozled! Chokeslam coming up!
SCOTT STANFORD: Show may make short work of The Miz here.
He then lifts him up for the chokeslam, but as he has him in the air, Miz pulls a Sharpie marker out of his trunks and begins signing his autograph on the Big Show's bald head! Show has to release him, as Miz nearly signed his name on the spot while up for the chokeslam!
BOOKER T: Dawg, he almost won da match by signing his name!
DON WEST: That's SMART! Miz has created a scenario where he could win with something so simple. The PEN is truly mightier than the SWORD!
Big Show is pissed as the Referee checks to see if Show's been defeated, but Miz only got part of his name signed. Big Show now grabs the Referee and tries to wipe the marker off his head using the Referee’s shirt. The Referee is yelling about that, but Show gets most of it wiped off. Unfortunately for him though, this has given Miz time to recover and Miz chopblocks him from behind, causing Show to go down to one knee. Big Show is holding his leg, as Miz starts raining fists down on top of his head. Now Miz with the marker still in his hand, JAMS IT INTO THE EYE OF THE BIG SHOW!
DON WEST: HE JUST AUTOGRAPHED HIS EYEBALL!
SCOTT STANFORD: My God, Don! He could have blinded him there!
BOOKER T: He tried to poke out his eye!
The Referee is yelling at Miz, as Big Show grabs at his eye and rolls around on the canvas blinded. One eye is now starting to swell up as that shot was nothing to laugh at. Miz lost his marker, but doesn't seem to care as he repeatedly puts the boots to the Big Show and then kicks him in the leg again. Now The Miz grabs Big Show's massive leg and spins it around into a FIGURE FOUR LEGLOCK! He's got the big man all tied up as a one-eyed Big Show screams in agony.
SCOTT STANFORD: Say what you will about how Miz has gotten to this point, but he has once again dominated the Big Show in a way that no one has up to this point.
DON WEST: It's not about how big you are, Stanford, it's about how smart you are! And Miz is clearly the smartest man on the roster!
BOOKER T: Dis guy a trickster!
SCOTT STANFORD: Whatever it is, it's effective, as Big Show looks like he might be ready to tap out here! But of course, that's not going to matter much in this match because he has to be autographed to lose. And that's not something I ever expected to say calling a wrestling match!
Big Show is screaming in pain, as Miz finally releases the figure four and begins berating the Referee for a marker. "GIVE ME THE MARKER!", he shouts, having used his own marker to gouge Show's eye. The Referee has a pocket full of writing utensils and hands Miz a fresh new marker, as Miz goes over to the Big Show's head and finishes his autograph from earlier!
DON WEST: IT'S OVER! RING THE BELL!
SCOTT STANFORD: Not so fast, Don! Miz completed that signature from earlier, but as you can clearly see, the Big Show wiped most of that off so it's not complete!
The Referee is informing Miz the exact same thing. Right now, Miz only has remnants of "The" on Show's head with "MIZ" clearly on there. It looks like Miz may be missing most of the T and a bit of the E as Show wiped it off using the Referee's shirt, and as Show profusely sweats during this contest, more of the ink has disappeared. Miz continues to argue with the Referee, saying it's not fair that Big Show has sweat part of his signature off, but he seems to be wholly unaware that Big Show is back on his feet, his vision cleared and looking PISSED! Miz turns around and POW! He gets a WMD right in the kisser! Miz looks to be completely out, but Big Show wants to make sure and hoists him up into the CHOKESLAM! He then asks the Referee for a marker. The Ref gives him one and Big Show leans down right onto the big red handprint he placed on Miz's chest earlier, signing his name in big bold letters across The Miz's chest. The Referee calls for the bell as Miz has the name THE BIG SHOW right on his chest!
WINNER
BIG SHOW
10:55 via Autograph
BOOKER T: Signed, sealed and delivered!
SCOTT STANFORD: Miz showed some great fire in there, but the Big Show turned the tables on him here tonight and scored the victory!
DON WEST: This is an outrage! Big Show's autograph is worth more now than ever!
BOOKER T: He's lucky he didn't get his ass autographed, sucka!
SCOTT STANFORD: Big Show with a measure of retribution that's a long time coming after The Miz got the best of him for the past few weeks!
The cameras cut away from that night back in 2018 to the studio where Renee, Eric, and Jim are softly laughing to themselves.
RENEE YOUNG: What can I see, guys, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a match quite like the Autograph Match! How do you even prepare for that?!
ERIC BISCHOFF: You have to assume Miz would have had the advantage in that match considering his name is one letter shorter than Big Show’s but that just was not the case.
JIM ROSS: The Big Show was one big, bad man and, I must say, had incredible penmanship!
RENEE YOUNG: Well it’s been all fun and games here tonight, guys, but we do have some work ahead of us!
RENEE YOUNG: While more matches are still being announced for SLAM!, I can’t imagine any will have as major implications as Drew McIntyre faces off with Dak Draper for sole possession of the EWA Tag Team Championship. We’ve seen a new side of Drew McIntyre but he has made one angry Mile High Magnum with his actions last week! That’s not all! In a match that has potential title implications, the former EWA Women’s Champion Jade Cargill goes one on one with the 2021 Queen of the Ring Taya Valkyrie. Team Taz will be in action as Rhea Ripley faces the debuting Lady Frost, Pete Dunne continues his path of destruction as he faces the unfortunate Glenn Gilbertti, the Dungeon Dynasty’s Ben Carter takes on the debuting “Tennessee Cowboy” James Storm, Giant Silva faces off with a member of the Mean Street Posse - no word if the 12-man tag team titles will be on the line though. Additionally we will see two EWA veterans and icons collide as Rob Van Dam takes on the Undertaker. Also scheduled for in-ring competition are Team Taz’s Hook, Rex Steiner, and the debuting team of Corey Graves and Shane Thorne known as the Worst. That’s one stacked line-up!
JIM ROSS: Don’t forget the EWA Women’s Champion Aliyah has announced that she will appear and hopefully we’ll find out just who attacked Shannon Moore last week!
ERIC BISCHOFF: Plus we all need to wear our Sunday best to celebrate the EWA World Champion Chris Jericho’s fourth SuperBrawl victory. Hopefully that idiot Santino Marella continues his “quest” to become the World Champion far, far away from it…
RENEE YOUNG: Well, folks, we’re out of time here! I want to thank you for spending your evening with us and we can’t wait for you to join us next time as we examine the fallout of what is sure to be a monumental Sunday Night SLAM! I’m Renee Young and they’re Jim Ross and Eric Bischoff and we… are out of time!