Post by Ross Report on Mar 19, 2019 9:04:51 GMT
I don't know if SLAM! falling on St. Patrick's Day had anything to do with it or if it was simply because we were in front of one of our hottest crowds in Philly, but boy, what a show we witnessed this past Sunday!
This week's show got underway with Becky Lynch being summoned (for lack of a better term) to the Eastern State Penitentiary by her Revelation teammate, Daffney. It's no secret that tensions have been rising between the two since "The Queenslayer" made her intentions towards the Women's Title known, yet Becky has surprising put those aspirations on hold for the time being. At least, until she gets Charlotte one-on-one again and finally defeats her long-time rival anyway. Obsession can be a dangerous thing, and it's fair to say that "The Lass Kicker" is very much obsessed with getting that monkey off her back. Either way though, it leaves more questions than answers as to what will happen regarding "The Zombie Goddess'" next challenger. Hopefully we'll find out more on the final SLAM! before Civil War this coming Sunday!
After weeks of getting one over on Jerry Lynn, "Honky Tonk Man" finally made his EWA in-ring debut by making short work of Jerry Baldwin, who I'm reliably informed isn't a relation to Adam or Billy or any of those other ones. If this was a statement of intent for what "The New F'N Show" can expect at Civil War, Lynn may be better off skipping the Pay-Per-View altogether. Especially considering he's yet to get one over on "Mr Shake, Rattle And Roll."
"The Reaper" gave a hell of a showing against Ken Shamrock the previous week on SLAM!, surprisingly doing so all by his lonesome in the process. Still, it feels pretty bizarre to see the man formerly known as Gabriel having seemingly bought into "The Horde," towing the party line and echoing Marty Scurll's rhetoric, even in the face of Renee Young's questions. Whether or not that continues in the foreseeable future remains to be seen, but for the time being, "The Horde" are adamant that they're all on the same page heading into Civil War, making them by far the biggest threat in that match. Still, we'll have to wait and see how true that is.
In tag team action, we saw two teams that both debuted on last week's show go to war this past Sunday when the "Guerrillas of Destiny" took on "Monster Mafia." The Samoan duo looked to gain an underhanded advantage right out of the gate, but their Canadian opponents seemed to be more than ready for them, quickly turning things around and showing off some impressive teamwork along the way. In the end, the duo of "All Ego" Ethan Page and "The Living Weapon" Josh Alexander managed to isolate Tama Tonga long enough to put him down with the same "Monster Mash" double team that won them their first EWA match! I'm sure Jay White can't be pleased at his allies for falling short like this, but as we'll soon discus, he had his own problems on this week's SLAM! Meanwhile, there's no disputing the fact that a win like this definitely moves "Monster Mafia" up the tag team ranks and perhaps even a step closer to a future title shot somewhere down the line!
"The Kingdom" have been in dominant form since arriving in the EWA, with Matt Taven and Scarlett Bordeaux especially putting together some stellar runs this year. So much so in fact that they this week found a would-be new member trying to muscle in on their act in Santino Marella! "The Italian Stallion" has got it stuck in his head that he needs to join a faction since that's what everyone else is doing lately, but I'm not sure he really endeared himself to Taven and co. by dressing up as a court jester. As it stands, "The Kingdom" ended up rejecting him much like the "bWo" did last week, meaning perhaps it's time to head back to the drawing board for Marella?
I've been thoroughly impressed with the high-flying submission specialist Angelico since his arrival. There's obviously a good reason why he was hand-picked by "The Kings of Wrestling" to join their ranks, and we saw plenty of evidence for that during his encounter with Brady Pierce this week. Let's not sell "The Wizard of Wrath" short however, as Pierce has obviously been around the block a time or two and can't be underestimated. The big South Carolina native proved to be a tough challenge for Angelico, utilizing his size and strength to great effect throughout this hard-hitting contest. However, the "Half-Man, Half-Amazing" superstar rallied against that onslaught to score his first EWA victory, and if I may be bold enough to say, I doubt it'll be his last either!
"ODB" returns in two weeks at Civil War...though who exactly is using those initials right now is something I wouldn't want to speculate on! We'll let you know when we hear something more concrete.
I'm sure I wasn't the only one who teared up at that heartbreaking "In Memoriam" video for the dearly departed "Scott E." However, as sad as that was, we were in for a huge surprise later in the show when we saw the funeral for the plastic flamingo, or at least as close as you can get to one without a body. I admire Buh Buh Ray's courage in leading the proceedings, even as his emotions perhaps threatened to get the best of him. Fortunately, the man from Dudleyville had the entirely "Flamingo Family" around him for support in these trying times, yet that beautiful scene was interrupted by the downright astonishing arrival of "Big Show!" We thought he'd been burnt to hell after that lightning strike last week, but no! In a shocking twist of fate, it seems as if the lightning somehow managed to transfer "Scott E.'s" consciousness into the body of the "World's Largest Athlete!" And with that, the "Flamingo Family" has found their newest member, right in time for Civil War!
One of the things I was most looking forward to this past week was to finally see Ember Moon make her in-ring debut, and boy, did she not disappoint! "The Villainess" certainly didn't have it easy though as she faced off against a former Women's Champion in JoJo! I've said it before and I'll say it again, but the "bWo" member is a lot tougher than she looks, and she took the fight to Moon in a big way. However, after some rather dubious play-acting, Ember Moon was able to capitalize on her opponent's compassion and secure a huge victory to get her off the mark. I guess I shouldn't be too surprised that a member of "The Horde" would resort to such cheap tricks to pick up the win, should I?
Who'd have thunk in 2019 we'd see Hollywood royalty in 102 year old Kirk Douglas officiate a contract signing between "The Vaudevillains" (or should that be "Vaude Vile Boys?") and "The Kings of Wrestling?" Not me, that's for damn sure! Yet that's precisely what happened on this week's show, with the star of "Spartacus" and "20,000 Leagues Under The Sea" trying to keep the peace between the EWA Tag Team Champions and their challengers. Usually, you can set a watch by the fact that these contract signings will end up in a mass brawl with someone going through a table, but not on this occasion! Instead though, we found out that not only would the title match happen on next week's SLAM! rather than waiting until Civil War, but it'll also take place within the confines of a steel cage! Talk up upping the ante! Last time they did battle, it was "The Kings" who emerged victorious in a 2 Out Of 3 Falls Match...but will history repeat itself once again? Or will "The Vaudevillains" take the lessons they've learned from the past and find a way to keep their titles? We'll find out next Sunday!
So, the cat's out of the bag. After getting a David Attenborough-esque video package on the puma a couple of weeks ago and then Salina De La Renta talking up the imminent arrival of a lucha libre star known as "The Prince" last week, we now know the identity of this newcomer to be none other than "Prince Puma!" And I for one can't wait to see his debut at Civil War, where you can bet the pressure will be on!
You could say that Jay White and Marty Scurll are two superstars cut from a similar cloth. Both tend not to care what the EWA Universe thinks about them and neither one seems to have any problems bending the rules to their advantage, and that made for an interesting contest this week. I would suggest the difference maker here though was Fit Finlay, who appeared in the crowd for a closer look at his recent rival. I admire "The Fighting Irishman's" restraint in not getting involved, especially after the sickening assault "Switchblade" delivered to Fit's son, Dave Jr, last week. Still, his mere presence was distraction enough to lead to White's downfall, with Scurll taking control of the match by stringing together a series of brutal moves before eventually cinching in the dreaded Crossface Chickenwing and leaving his opponent no choice but to tap. By the time Finlay finally got past security and had his chance to go after "Switchblade" though, Jay White somehow gathered enough wits about him to escape before the National Champion could do much harm. Still, it looks like it's only a matter of time before Fit Finlay finds himself one-on-one with Jay White and has a shot at making him pay for the things he's said and done in recent weeks.
I wish I knew what to say about the interruption to SLAM!'s broadcast with the inaugural snippet of "C.L.o.W.N." (that's the "Chartered League Of Wrestling Naturals," to you and I). Honestly though, the whole thing gave me the creeps! First we witnessed Psycho Clown in action before "King" WALTER himself took to the ring in a strange arena in front of an audience of harlequins to capture the "C.L.o.W.N." Heavyweight Championship of the World. What makes this all the more confusing is the fact that "King" WALTER supposedly quit the EWA just seven days prior, so how he still forced his way onto this week's show I couldn't tell you. The only thing I know for sure though is that this isn't likely the last time we'll see these kinds of interruptions if "King" WALTER's warnings are to be believed.
Pete Dunne was involved in a phenomenal Triple Threat Match a few weeks ago, and he found himself in another this past Sunday against two EWA stalwarts in John Cena and Kenny Omega. Following on from his spectacular showing against Samoa Joe, "The Cleaner" once again looked sharp here, almost like the Omega of old again. By stark contrast though, it's still somewhat jarring to see "The Doctor of Thuganomics" resorting to such nefarious tactics to try and get ahead. I'm trying not to let my emotions get in the way of my journalistic integrity here, but after the way he put his hands on me several weeks ago, I'd be lying if I said seeing Pete Dunne lay him out with the Bitter End didn't put a smile on my face. However, while Dunne picked up another big win, he was then confronted by Samoa Joe post-match, the same man who decimated both members of Mustache Mountain last week and put Tyler Bate on the shelf for at least a month, albeit appearing via the EWA-Tron rather than squaring up to Dunne face-to-face. But then, that's Joe's "M.O." all over, playing mind games to get under the skin of his enemies before physically grinding them down and leaving nothing left. As such, rather than challenging Dunne himself to a match, he's demanded one against Tyler's tag team partner Trent Seven. Something tells me that "The Don" will gladly accept the opportunity to gain a measure of revenge, even if Dunne wishes it was him stepping in the ring next week. Still, when Samoa Joe is involved, I'd certainly err on the side of caution here. Who knows what the "Samoan Submission Machine" has up his sleeve next Sunday!
Last week saw "Father" James Mitchell plot to make a trade...Ken Shamrock's wife for the mysterious onyx stone that Shamrock had taken from him! Well, this week's SLAM! saw "The World's Most Dangerous Man" try to force the situation, demanding his wife back! Mitchell and his mindless monster PCO brought Tonya Shamrock to ringside to do just that, but in a shocking turn of events, Ken Shamrock found himself unable to complete the transaction, almost of the onyx stone had cast some kind of spell over him. Thankfully though, his wife was able to break through the stone's whammy and make the World Champion see sense, allowing them to finally reunite! Still, that doesn't change the fact that in two weeks time, we'll see the rematch we've all been waiting for ever since Collision Course when Shamrock defends the top prize in the sport against PCO once again! And I dare say that with PCO showing more and more signs of...well, not humanity exactly...but at the very least, signs of consciousness after months of blindly following "The Sinister Minister's" every command, that could make for an even more unpredictable match than their first encounter!
With another classic SLAM! in the bag, it's time for my least favorite part of the week as I try and choose my top three movers and shakers:
1. Big Show/Scott E.
2. Pete Dunne
3. Marty Scurll
It may not be a conventional choice, but screw it...thanks to the crazy revelation that not only did both of them deny the Grim Reaper last week, but "Scott E." has somehow taken over "Big Show's" body, this new hybrid superstar is the only option for the number one slot as far as I'm concerned. In second place, Pete Dunne once again pulled off a big time victory over tough opposition, building some all-important momentum heading into Civil War, even as he still has Samoa Joe to contend with. And bringing up the rear in third spot, Marty Scurll kept his 2019 undefeated streak alive in decisive fashion by defeating one of the top young prospects in the company. If I were a betting man, I'm starting to think I'd put all my chips on Scurll to walk out as the winner of this year's Civil War with the way things are going right now.
We've still got one more stop to make though before the EWA rolls into San Antonio for our annual "brawl for it all," and that's coming at you live from the Quicken Loans Arena in Cleveland! The show looks set to be headlined by that blockbuster of a Tag Team Title Match taking place inside a Steel Cage, while also featuring Trent Seven trying to get revenge against Samoa Joe in singles competition, and quite possibly one of the most eagerly anticipated debuts in some time when "The Great Khali" arrives! All that and you can be sure we'll see the latest developments between Shamrock and "Father" James Mitchell's monster, as well as whatever the heck is going on next with Big Show/"Scott E." In short, you're not going to want to miss the last stop on the road to Civil War, so I'll see you there! Until then,
BOOMER SOONER!
